Wow!, what a year it's been. Last year I turned 40, I am still in shock! although it's now even more shocking that I am about to turn 41! holy toledo, sweet, mother of pearl...! I am totally freaked out! about this new stage, I feel like a 25 year old in a 40 year old body whose subjects(especially my teenager) just don't get it!!. I also began my spiritual journey (as I like to call it) last year, I don't know if I have been so extremely busy with life or just lazy. But... I have lost that personal relationship with God that I feel sure, I once had. My question now is, did I have my own relationship with God? or was is my parents relationship with God?. I'm a PK, so that in and of itself is another whole issue that I am trying to work through. I feel confident in this new year, that I will have that personal relationship with God that I am so desperately seeking. Exercising, it feels great,I worked out plenty, but not enough for me, so this year is my year to kick it way up!!. Last year, I realized that I needed to surround myself with healthy positive people, but failed to. Fear, it paralyzed me, and truth, was freeing. Friends, some helped, some hindered, some negative (I lost those), some positive (I kept those), some with heart breaking, mind numbing news, that will change their lives and those that surround them, for those and myself included, I found this awesome passage in Philippians that says when the days are dark and clouded by worry and you cry out to God remember "The Lord is near" "Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus." I love that!,now... when worries arises,as they often do, I quietly whisper "The Lord is near, the Lord is near."
God wants our best, deserves our best, and demands our best, from the beginning of time, He has been clear that some offerings are acceptable to him and others are not. It's easy to fill ourselves up with other things and then give God whatever is left. Hosea 13:6 says, "When I fed them, they were satisfied; when they were satisfied, they became proud; then they forgot me." God gets a scrap or two only because we feel guilty for not giving Him nothing. A mumbled three minute prayer at the end of the day, when we are already half asleep. Two crumpled-up dollar bills thrown as an afterthought into the church's fund for the poor. Fetch, God! Wow! this brings tears to my eyes, for this is me, so busy with my life, kids, family that I have been satisfied just giving Him my leftovers! Leftovers are not merely inadequate; from God's point of view(and lest we forget, His is the only one that matters), they're evil. lets stop calling it a "busy schedule" or ...
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