Cold winter evening, perched on the window seat near the fire, snow falling from the cold gray skies above, Fingers intertwined around a glass of Malbec. Sirens and suddenly the mind begins its decent down a road, long sense pushed to the edge of the mind. Far from the madness, thought I'd escaped. Sirens, it takes my breath away, for a moment the rise and fall of my breathing becomes labored as I gasp for air, the oxygen suddenly seems to have evaporated from the room. I'm desperate to get air, for I've no idea what's happening, mind racing, how could I lose control in an instant, how did I forget how to breathe. Suddenly the emotion is all to clear as it begins, flooding my entire being, washing over my soul as the rains fill the lake overflowing breaking the dam. I feel tears begin to stream down my face. I'm thrown into a sea of memories, desire, joyous, dreamy, unforgettable, closeness, connection, carefree, all sane thoughts compartmetalized into tiny boxes, no rationale, just being. So easy, yet overwhelmingly draining all together in one seamless flow of highs and lows. Sand, ocean, music, laughter, madness, erupting into rivers of sadness at yet another loss. My soul is on fire. One spark and out of control, the flames begin their rise. Blue skies, hot glistening days, into warm summer evenings. Burned into memory for it will last a lifetime. Sounds....ocean, waves crashing as the tide rolls in. Feelings.....heat, warmth, fire, sand beneath fingers as they grasp and release. Sights....stars brightly shining in the midnight sky, summer moonshine, lights twinkling in the distance, burning into memory. Connected souls. Shared secrets, heartbreaking, life changing hurts, crushing pains. Understanding, sympathies. The rise and fall...Sirens, "the sounds echoing closer, will they come for me next time, I study your face the fear goes away, if I think to much I can get overwhelmed by the grace, by which we live our lives with death over our shoulders." Awakened by reality just as it is, serene....early morning sunrise the noise, turns to calm, quite beauty, Alive.
Comments