Wow!, what a year it's been. Last year I turned 40, I am still in shock! although it's now even more shocking that I am about to turn 41! holy toledo, sweet, mother of pearl...! I am totally freaked out! about this new stage, I feel like a 25 year old in a 40 year old body whose subjects(especially my teenager) just don't get it!!. I also began my spiritual journey (as I like to call it) last year, I don't know if I have been so extremely busy with life or just lazy. But... I have lost that personal relationship with God that I feel sure, I once had. My question now is, did I have my own relationship with God? or was is my parents relationship with God?. I'm a PK, so that in and of itself is another whole issue that I am trying to work through. I feel confident in this new year, that I will have that personal relationship with God that I am so desperately seeking. Exercising, it feels great,I worked out plenty, but not enough for me, so this year is my year to kick it way up!!. Last year, I realized that I needed to surround myself with healthy positive people, but failed to. Fear, it paralyzed me, and truth, was freeing. Friends, some helped, some hindered, some negative (I lost those), some positive (I kept those), some with heart breaking, mind numbing news, that will change their lives and those that surround them, for those and myself included, I found this awesome passage in Philippians that says when the days are dark and clouded by worry and you cry out to God remember "The Lord is near" "Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus." I love that!,now... when worries arises,as they often do, I quietly whisper "The Lord is near, the Lord is near."
Being a single parent, never thought it would be me, yet here I sit in the throws of, (for all intense purposes), (the last 8 months and a few more I, feel sure.) single parenthood. This evening as I look around my home, my children all in their place. My eldest up late finishing up some college homework, my younger two fast asleep as they have to rise early and begin the morning rush of tiding up and getting ready for school before sunrise I'll make them a bowl of warm oatmeal, give them their vitamins and hot tea with honey, fuss with them to hurry, so much to do, finish breakfast, walk the beagle, grab backpacks, heavy coats, scarfs, hats and gloves and rush out the door to the bus stop. I realize just how much work it is for one parent, how draining it can be, the sheer toll it can take, many days I've come home from work, exhausted, wishing so badly I could just fall in to bed and sleep for twelve hours. Being a single parent doesn't allow for exhausted days, it doesn...
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